The great folks at the-editing-room.com have done it again. This time, the abridged script is "The Happening". Here's a sample:
Suddenly, THE HAPPENING stops HAPPENING, largely because the audience members left to go get a REFUND.
An EXPERT comes on TELEVISION to explain the movie for the benefit of any RETARDED PEOPLE in the AUDIENCE.
You see, it seems that plants became tired of the way we treat our environment, so they started releasing a deadly toxin.
Why didn't they just stop producing oxygen?
Well where's the unwatchable pile of garbage of a film in that?
You can read the whole thing here. Note, there is some vulgarity.