A big thank you to Dennis for this one. Check out his fantastic blog here: http://laslohollyfeld.livejournal.com/
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Monday, January 19, 2009
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
The Failure Blog
This is a fantastic blog I found online. Check out all the photos here:
http://failblog.wordpress.com/2008/01/
TV gameshow failure
Spelling bee failure
Government failure
LOL cat failure
http://failblog.wordpress.com/2008/01/
TV gameshow failure
Spelling bee failure
Government failure
LOL cat failure
Space shuttle failure
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Thursday, January 3, 2008
New CD Liner Notes from your friend the RIAA
I found these at http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/riaa-liner-notes.php and had to post them. New CD inserts from your friend the RIAA.
Monday, December 31, 2007
Star Wars toys that never made the market
Destroyed moisture farm of Uncle Owen and Aunt Beru. Burning corpses sold separately.
The action figures to go with the moisture farm
Here's the charred edition if you prefer
It's not an empty box, it's full of the force.
Wednesday, November 14, 2007
Utah Cows Flee After Seeing McDonald's
WEST HAVEN, Utah - McDonald's? The burger joint? Stampede! Eight cows escaped from a trailer when the rear gate opened as the driver pulled into a McDonald's. It took about two hours to round them up Monday.
"Maybe they were going to ... hop in the freezer, save the middleman," Weber County sheriff's Sgt. Dave Creager said. Lt. Kevin Burns had another theory: "They didn't like their future."
The roundup was called "Operation Hamburger Helper." A nearby resident even hopped on his horse. "I thought my eyes were lying," said Wayne Sanders, who was at a truck stop next door. "I don't know where they came from, but I'd say they'd have to weigh 800 pounds apiece and they were on a pretty good trot."
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071114/ap_on_fe_st/odd_cows_escape_mcdonald_s
"Maybe they were going to ... hop in the freezer, save the middleman," Weber County sheriff's Sgt. Dave Creager said. Lt. Kevin Burns had another theory: "They didn't like their future."
The roundup was called "Operation Hamburger Helper." A nearby resident even hopped on his horse. "I thought my eyes were lying," said Wayne Sanders, who was at a truck stop next door. "I don't know where they came from, but I'd say they'd have to weigh 800 pounds apiece and they were on a pretty good trot."
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071114/ap_on_fe_st/odd_cows_escape_mcdonald_s
Sunday, November 4, 2007
Police Want to Reunite 75 Stolen Gnomes With their Owners
Springfield, Oregon Police are investigating the theft of 75 yard gnomes that disappeared from all over the city's neighborhoods, and ended up in a family's yard.
Frogs, turtles, ducks, rabbits and all sorts of creatures comprise this gathering of ornamental yard ornaments. As they are now inhabiting the police department, Captain Richard Harrison with Springfield Police and his detectives says they are exploring ways to get these ornaments back to their homes.
I think police should be looking at the Travelocity.com gnome as the prime suspect of this cult like gathering of lawn ornaments. That's just my opinion though.
Sunday, October 7, 2007
I retract that last post. THIS is the greatest action figure in the world
In my last post, I said that the victims of a B-Movie were the coolest action figures ever. I have to eat my own words, because after I published that post, I saw "GLOW IN THE DARK, FLESH-EATING ZOMBIE" action figures!!!
The description on the website says "Wreak havoc on your little sister's precious diorama with this Flesh Eating Zombie Play Set! Each set includes nine 1" to 3.25" tall, hard vinyl zombies, complete with blank stares, gaping mouths, open wounds and missing limbs!
Turn off the lights and they glow! Fantastic undead fun for the whole family!"
It's $14.49 and I'll just have to combine the two sets into one fantastic zombie apocalypse diorama at my cubicle. I can't wait.
You can order them here: http://www.perpetualkid.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=2295
The description on the website says "Wreak havoc on your little sister's precious diorama with this Flesh Eating Zombie Play Set! Each set includes nine 1" to 3.25" tall, hard vinyl zombies, complete with blank stares, gaping mouths, open wounds and missing limbs!
Turn off the lights and they glow! Fantastic undead fun for the whole family!"
It's $14.49 and I'll just have to combine the two sets into one fantastic zombie apocalypse diorama at my cubicle. I can't wait.
You can order them here: http://www.perpetualkid.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=2295
Greatest action figures of all time
Yes. I am a geek. I know it. I realize it. I embrace it.
I am always on the look out for cool things to decorate my desk at work with. I figure if I have to spend more time at a cubicle than I get to spend at home, I am going to make it fun, unique and interesting. I currently have Warner Brothers Halloween lights hanging from the shelf above my computer, along with my bobble head Darth Vader, my stuffed Buddha, an Immortal from the movie "300" and a Wheezy the Penguin from "Toy Story 2". I have a movie poster calendar and Mickey Mouse and Friends Tiki Office supplies. (Stapler, Pen holder, etc.)
This however, has jumped onto the MUST HAVE list.
It's a horrified B-Movies victims play set. The description of the set says "We provide the victims, you provide the terror! Each dramatic play set includes nine 2-1/2" to 3" tall, hard vinyl victims captured in utterly terrified poses!
Are they reacting to the advances of a giant, man-eating tomato or the sight of your grandma in her nightgown and curlers?
The possibilities are endless!"
Does it get any cooler than that?
The set is 14.99 and you can buy it here:
http://www.perpetualkid.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=1728
I am always on the look out for cool things to decorate my desk at work with. I figure if I have to spend more time at a cubicle than I get to spend at home, I am going to make it fun, unique and interesting. I currently have Warner Brothers Halloween lights hanging from the shelf above my computer, along with my bobble head Darth Vader, my stuffed Buddha, an Immortal from the movie "300" and a Wheezy the Penguin from "Toy Story 2". I have a movie poster calendar and Mickey Mouse and Friends Tiki Office supplies. (Stapler, Pen holder, etc.)
This however, has jumped onto the MUST HAVE list.
It's a horrified B-Movies victims play set. The description of the set says "We provide the victims, you provide the terror! Each dramatic play set includes nine 2-1/2" to 3" tall, hard vinyl victims captured in utterly terrified poses!
Are they reacting to the advances of a giant, man-eating tomato or the sight of your grandma in her nightgown and curlers?
The possibilities are endless!"
Does it get any cooler than that?
The set is 14.99 and you can buy it here:
http://www.perpetualkid.com/index.asp?PageAction=VIEWPROD&ProdID=1728
Monday, August 27, 2007
Ready to feel old?
Here is a list of what the mindset is of the class of 2011
Ready to feel old?
____________________________________________________________________________
What Berlin wall?
Humvees, minus the artillery, have always been available to the public.
Rush Limbaugh and the "Dittoheads" have always been lambasting liberals.
They never "rolled down" a car window.
Michael Moore has always been angry and funny.
They may confuse the Keating Five with a rock group.
They have grown up with bottled water.
General Motors has always been working on an electric car.
Nelson Mandela has always been free and a force in South Africa.
Pete Rose has never played baseball.
Rap music has always been mainstream.
Religious leaders have always been telling politicians what to do, or else!
"Off the hook" has never had anything to do with a telephone.
Music has always been "unplugged."
Russia has always had a multi-party political system.
Women have always been police chiefs in major cities.
They were born the year Harvard Law Review Editor Barack Obama announced he might run for office some day.
The NBA season has always gone on and on and on and on.
Classmates could include Michelle Wie, Jordin Sparks, and Bart Simpson.
Half of them may have been members of the Baby-sitters Club.
Eastern Airlines has never "earned their wings" in their lifetime.
No one has ever been able to sit down comfortably to a meal of "liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti."
Wal-Mart has always been a larger retailer than Sears and has always employed more workers than GM.
Being "lame" has to do with being dumb or inarticulate, not disabled.
Wolf Blitzer has always been serving up the news on CNN.
Katie Couric has always had screen cred.
Al Gore has always been running for president or thinking about it.
They never found a prize in a Coca-Cola "MagiCan."
They were too young to understand Judas Priest's subliminal messages.
When all else fails, the Prozac defense has always been a possibility.
Multigrain chips have always provided healthful junk food.
They grew up in Wayne's World.
U2 has always been more than a spy plane.
They were introduced to Jack Nicholson as "The Joker."
Stadiums, rock tours and sporting events have always had corporate names.
American rock groups have always appeared in Moscow.
Commercial product placements have been the norm in films and on TV.
On Parents' Day on campus, their folks could be mixing it up with Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz with daughter Zöe, or Kathie
Lee and Frank Gifford with son Cody.
Fox has always been a major network.
They drove their parents crazy with the Beavis and Butt-Head laugh.
The "Blue Man Group" has always been everywhere.
Women's studies majors have always been offered on campus.
Being a latchkey kid has never been a big deal.
Thanks to MySpace and Facebook, autobiography can happen in real time.
They learned about JFK from Oliver Stone and Malcolm X from Spike Lee.
Most phone calls have never been private.
High definition television has always been available.
Microbreweries have always been ubiquitous.
Virtual reality has always been available when the real thing failed.
Smoking has never been allowed in public spaces in France.
China has always been more interested in making money than in re-education.
Time has always worked with Warner.
Tiananmen Square is a 2008 Olympics venue, not the scene of a massacre.
The purchase of ivory has always been banned.
MTV has never featured music videos.
The space program has never really caught their attention except in disasters.
Jerry Springer has always been lowering the level of discourse on TV.
They get much more information from Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert than from the newspaper.
They're always texting 1 n other.
They will encounter roughly equal numbers of female and male professors in the classroom.
They never saw Johnny Carson live on television.
They have no idea who Rusty Jones was or why he said "goodbye to rusty cars."
Avatars have nothing to do with Hindu deities.
Chavez has nothing to do with iceberg lettuce and everything to do with oil.
Illinois has been trying to ban smoking since the year they were born.
The World Wide Web has been an online tool since they were born.
Chronic fatigue syndrome has always been debilitating and controversial.
Burma has always been Myanmar.
Dilbert has always been ridiculing cubicle culture.
Food packaging has always included nutritional labeling.
Ready to feel old?
____________________________________________________________________________
What Berlin wall?
Humvees, minus the artillery, have always been available to the public.
Rush Limbaugh and the "Dittoheads" have always been lambasting liberals.
They never "rolled down" a car window.
Michael Moore has always been angry and funny.
They may confuse the Keating Five with a rock group.
They have grown up with bottled water.
General Motors has always been working on an electric car.
Nelson Mandela has always been free and a force in South Africa.
Pete Rose has never played baseball.
Rap music has always been mainstream.
Religious leaders have always been telling politicians what to do, or else!
"Off the hook" has never had anything to do with a telephone.
Music has always been "unplugged."
Russia has always had a multi-party political system.
Women have always been police chiefs in major cities.
They were born the year Harvard Law Review Editor Barack Obama announced he might run for office some day.
The NBA season has always gone on and on and on and on.
Classmates could include Michelle Wie, Jordin Sparks, and Bart Simpson.
Half of them may have been members of the Baby-sitters Club.
Eastern Airlines has never "earned their wings" in their lifetime.
No one has ever been able to sit down comfortably to a meal of "liver with some fava beans and a nice Chianti."
Wal-Mart has always been a larger retailer than Sears and has always employed more workers than GM.
Being "lame" has to do with being dumb or inarticulate, not disabled.
Wolf Blitzer has always been serving up the news on CNN.
Katie Couric has always had screen cred.
Al Gore has always been running for president or thinking about it.
They never found a prize in a Coca-Cola "MagiCan."
They were too young to understand Judas Priest's subliminal messages.
When all else fails, the Prozac defense has always been a possibility.
Multigrain chips have always provided healthful junk food.
They grew up in Wayne's World.
U2 has always been more than a spy plane.
They were introduced to Jack Nicholson as "The Joker."
Stadiums, rock tours and sporting events have always had corporate names.
American rock groups have always appeared in Moscow.
Commercial product placements have been the norm in films and on TV.
On Parents' Day on campus, their folks could be mixing it up with Lisa Bonet and Lenny Kravitz with daughter Zöe, or Kathie
Lee and Frank Gifford with son Cody.
Fox has always been a major network.
They drove their parents crazy with the Beavis and Butt-Head laugh.
The "Blue Man Group" has always been everywhere.
Women's studies majors have always been offered on campus.
Being a latchkey kid has never been a big deal.
Thanks to MySpace and Facebook, autobiography can happen in real time.
They learned about JFK from Oliver Stone and Malcolm X from Spike Lee.
Most phone calls have never been private.
High definition television has always been available.
Microbreweries have always been ubiquitous.
Virtual reality has always been available when the real thing failed.
Smoking has never been allowed in public spaces in France.
China has always been more interested in making money than in re-education.
Time has always worked with Warner.
Tiananmen Square is a 2008 Olympics venue, not the scene of a massacre.
The purchase of ivory has always been banned.
MTV has never featured music videos.
The space program has never really caught their attention except in disasters.
Jerry Springer has always been lowering the level of discourse on TV.
They get much more information from Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert than from the newspaper.
They're always texting 1 n other.
They will encounter roughly equal numbers of female and male professors in the classroom.
They never saw Johnny Carson live on television.
They have no idea who Rusty Jones was or why he said "goodbye to rusty cars."
Avatars have nothing to do with Hindu deities.
Chavez has nothing to do with iceberg lettuce and everything to do with oil.
Illinois has been trying to ban smoking since the year they were born.
The World Wide Web has been an online tool since they were born.
Chronic fatigue syndrome has always been debilitating and controversial.
Burma has always been Myanmar.
Dilbert has always been ridiculing cubicle culture.
Food packaging has always included nutritional labeling.
Monday, July 23, 2007
Donuts. Is there anything they can’t do?
I really want "The Simpsons Movie" to be funny. It doesn't have to be "Citizen Kane", just funny. I stopped watching the TV show years ago because it stopped being funny, but the movie does look good. So, here is my Simpsons avatar and a link to the 101 greatest lines from "The Simpsons"
http://blogzarro.com/?p=223
Thursday, July 19, 2007
Hide your I-Pod from would be thieves
Hide your I-Pod in a Microsoft Zune! No one will want to steal it if they think it's a Zune! For a really geeky laugh, click their order button.
http://hideapod.com/
From their Frequently Asked Questions page:
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Can I choose my Zune color?
Sorry, no. We only use brown Zunes for the maximum anti-theft protection.
How can you do this so cheap?
There were a lot of disappointed kids last Christmas who wanted an iPod but were given a Zune by some well-meaning friend or relative. Consequently, there is a glut of Zunes available on eBay every day. We buy ‘em cheap and throw away the guts to make our product at a great price.
Will all iPod models (and iPhone) fit?
Of course! The Zune is so incredibly huge that there’s plenty of room for any iPod or iPhone along with your choice of accessories, a sack lunch, and maybe a small cat.
Do you make the Zune control wheel scroll the iPod?
The Zune control wheel is a fake. Get over it! The Zune looks like it has a scroll wheel on the front but it’s just a round hunk of plastic with a few buttons under it. There’s not much we can do about that.
Does my iPod gain any of the Zune features?
We leave the Zune’s wifi circuitry in place, but disconnected. It will then work just about as well with your iPod as it does with a regular Zune.
Do I get the Zune headphones too?
Of course. Getting rid of those shiny white ear buds is a key part of the anti-theft system. We provide the original brown earbuds because we certainly don’t have any other use for them.
http://hideapod.com/
From their Frequently Asked Questions page:
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQ)
Can I choose my Zune color?
Sorry, no. We only use brown Zunes for the maximum anti-theft protection.
How can you do this so cheap?
There were a lot of disappointed kids last Christmas who wanted an iPod but were given a Zune by some well-meaning friend or relative. Consequently, there is a glut of Zunes available on eBay every day. We buy ‘em cheap and throw away the guts to make our product at a great price.
Will all iPod models (and iPhone) fit?
Of course! The Zune is so incredibly huge that there’s plenty of room for any iPod or iPhone along with your choice of accessories, a sack lunch, and maybe a small cat.
Do you make the Zune control wheel scroll the iPod?
The Zune control wheel is a fake. Get over it! The Zune looks like it has a scroll wheel on the front but it’s just a round hunk of plastic with a few buttons under it. There’s not much we can do about that.
Does my iPod gain any of the Zune features?
We leave the Zune’s wifi circuitry in place, but disconnected. It will then work just about as well with your iPod as it does with a regular Zune.
Do I get the Zune headphones too?
Of course. Getting rid of those shiny white ear buds is a key part of the anti-theft system. We provide the original brown earbuds because we certainly don’t have any other use for them.
Wednesday, July 18, 2007
Cult Movie Poster
Can you recognize all the cult movie references in this brand new Christopher Lee poster? Send an email at gallery1988@aol.com, listing all the references you can spot and we'll pick a winner from the contestants who get the most correct! Winner to get a signed version (Chris Lee and maybe one of the icons seen on the poster to sign????) and elusive artist proofs of the CRAZY 4 CULT prints from Greg "Craola" Simkins and Matt Dangler." The winner to get prizes by August 31.
http://www.nineteeneightyeight.com/crazy/crazy.html
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
The girl whose hair was too big for her mugshot
A woman in Tennessee was arrested for drunk driving, and they had to figure out a way to get all of her hair in the photo.
Police spokesman Sergeant Vince Higgins said: "We have to take the mugshot picture as the person looks at the time of the arrest, so we needed to make sure we got all her hair in. When we pulled her over she had been driving with her sunroof open to allow room for her hair. I don’t know what she'd do if it rained."
Sunday, July 15, 2007
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